


Disco is Dead

by jadesparrow333



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Fidds is in here too but only for a split second so I didn't feel right about tagging him, Forduary, Gen, Road Trip
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-12
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-20 10:08:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30003270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jadesparrow333/pseuds/jadesparrow333
Summary: Ford's move to Gravity Falls doesn't go as smoothly as he thought it would.
Comments: 8
Kudos: 10
Collections: Forduary





	Disco is Dead

“ _…the dark, weird road I travel…”_

“Take care of yerself, Stanford,” Fiddleford said as Ford slammed the trunk of his car; the last items packed securely. “If you ever need anything, you let me or Emma-May know, and we’ll be there in two twitches of a badgers nose!”

Ford smiled at his former roommate. “Thanks, buddy.” He shook Fiddleford’s hand. “Good luck in California. Give Emma-May my love.”

Fiddleford nodded. “Will do.” He shaded his eyes and squinted at the sky. “Are ya sure ya don’t wanna wait until tomorrow? It’s an awful long drive to Oregon, and it’s getting dark pretty soon.”

“Come on, Fiddleford, you know I do my best work when everyone else is asleep!” Ford grinned jovially as he opened his car door.

Fiddleford frowned. “I dunno, Stanford, I can’t shake these heebie jeebies. ‘Course, that could just be a hereditary mental artifact from when our ancestors knew better and went inside at sunset to avoid the things in the dark, but what do I know?”

Ford laughed. “That’s _exactly_ what it is!” he said, then climbed into his car, started it up, and waved out the window. “Thanks for everything, Fiddleford! Take care!” and with a final wave he drove off into the sunset.

This was it. After years of working himself to the bone and pulling his own weight, he was finally embarking on his true calling of studying anomalies. Nothing could hold him back now- not the bullies who teased him growing up, not his ridiculous college, not his traitor broth-

“No.” he said to himself out loud. Now was not the time to dwell on the past, but to dream about the future. And what was his motto- ad astra per aspera. To the stars through hardship. He certainly had his fair share of hardship, and all that was waiting for him was the stars. He turned on the radio and with a wide smile, continued on his path to the future.

A few hours later it was pitch dark- no streetlights, no moon, just the shine from Ford’s headlights as he sped down the road. The last available radio station had dissolved into static about ten minutes ago, so Ford had turned it off. The quiet was adding to the thrilling feeling of being in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night. This was when exciting things happened.

Of course, it would be quite inconvenient if anything exciting happened to him _now_. All of his field study tools were safely packed away and he wouldn’t be able to get to them in time. Still, he couldn’t deny there was something almost… menacing in the air. 

He shook his head. That was just Fiddleford’s talk about heebie jeebies getting to him. It wasn’t menacing, it was almost…magical. Yes, magical. 

So what if magical wasn’t always a good thing?

A movement caught the corner of his eye right outside the passenger side of the car, and he automatically swerved away, barely avoiding driving into the lane of oncoming traffic. Luckily there were no other cars, and as he corrected he slowed down and tried to snatch glimpses out of his window to see if he could figure out what it was.

A horse was galloping alongside his car.

“What?” he muttered out loud. What was a _horse_ doing on the highway? This late at night? The side of the road looked awfully empty with no dwellings in sight… but maybe he just hadn’t noticed them. After a few more moments of splitting his time between watching the road and watching the horse, he shrugged and hit the accelerator once more, leaving the odd sighting behind.

And that’s when it hit him- he could _see_ the horse. A split second later he realized it was because of the full moon. But it was completely dark a few minutes ago- was there even supposed to be a full moon that night? Maybe the moon had just recently risen, and that’s why he just now noticed it.

Mind racing, Ford flipped on the radio to see if he was back in range of a station, and was greeted with a cacophony of noise. It possibly could be called music; there were instruments playing and there seemed to be some sort of voice, but there was so much noise it was probably just the static overtaking the station. He sighed and flipped it off once again, still pondering the full moon and the galloping horse.

A ping broke him out of his thoughts, and in dismay he saw a little light on his dashboard telling him he needed to get gas soon. How was that possible? He had a full tank when he left, surely he didn’t need to fill up now! He tapped the dashboard, hoping it was just a short and the warning would go away, but no luck.

Ford sighed, and started paying attention to the road signs more, hoping to find an exit soon, pushing away the part of himself that was trying to make him panic. No time for that now.

The stomach churning minutes passed agonizingly slow, and Ford was starting to think about the possibilities of turning the things in his trunk into some sort of fuel, when his headlights caught sight of a blue sign with a little square logo of a gas station and white print at the top saying “Next Exit.”

He let out a sigh of relief and steered his car to follow the path of the offramp.

A moment later, his relief turned into something akin to outrage as he pulled into the gas station. Two dollars for gas? It had to be a mistake. He noticed the sign on the pump telling cash payers to pay inside, and knew that’s where it would get to the bottom of it. Yes, it was probably some sort of mix up…

An electronic beeping noise announced Ford’s arrival, but the teen boy behind the counter didn’t even look up, and was instead focused on something in his hands. No one else was in the store; the only other noise was a television in the back playing some sort of cartoon show and the hum of the fluorescent lights that weren’t allowing for a single shadow in the building.

“Excuse me,” Ford said as he walked up to the counter.

“Yeah?” the boy asked in a monotone, before putting the rectangle he was holding facedown on the counter by the cash register. He looked up, giving Ford a once over, and raised an eyebrow. “You _do_ know disco is dead, right?”

Ford was far too interested in the rectangle on the counter to give much thought to the boy’s comment. “Is that one of the new handheld gaming devices? I’ve heard about them but have never seen them up close! May I take a look?”

“…Nooo.” the boy said simply, his expression more disdainful than Ford thought was strictly called for.

“Oh.” he answered, slightly taken aback. “OK." He cleared his throat. "Well. I need to speak with you about the gas prices. I know that two dollars a gallon must be a mistake. It’s far too expensive for gas.”

“Dude, _that’s_ the lowest it’s been all year.” the boy stated.

“Lowest it’s been all… this is an outrage!” Ford said. “It’s price gouging, pure and simple! You take advantage of poor souls who are just trying to get through this wasteland, so they have to make a choice between paying an arm and a leg or being stranded… you should be ashamed of yourself!”

The kid put up his hands. “Hey, I don’t set the prices, I just work here.”

Ford glared at him for a few moments, then sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Right. Right, of course.” He deflated. “Fine.” He slapped some bills on the counter. “Pump six.” He said, and stalked out.

Ford leaned against his car while watching the gas pump- they had some sort of electronic digital counter; maybe that’s why their prices were so high- and let his mind drift. Something was off, and it was putting him on edge. He rarely lost his temper so quickly in public, that was more the style of his… no, he was just getting tired. 

Part of him wanted to stick around and investigate, but another part of him was begging him to just fill up his car and go.

The gas pump clicked, indicating the tank was full, and Ford saw he had some change to pick up. He decided to go in, get his change, buy a Pitt Cola to help him stay awake, and leave.

The electronic beep once again announced his arrival, and Ford went straight to the back of the store where the drinks were located.

He stood under the television as his eyes scanned the refrigerator cases full of brands he didn’t recognize… Fanta? Sprite? Coca Cola? Where was the Hurzch? The Pitt Cola?

As he searched the case, he started to listen to what was playing on the television- some sort of advertisement, judging by the disjointed dialogue…

“Everything I’ve worked for, it’s all for this family!”

“This Mystery Shack is over forever…”

“The mystery you don’t want to end…”

“There’s a town in need of saving!”

“Is the finale you don’t want to miss.”

“I just wish summer could last forever.”

Hm. Sounded interesting.

But where was the Pitt?

Ford walked over to the counter, empty handed. “I’d like the change on pump six,”

“Sure,” the kid said, shoving the rectangle in his pocket and not making eye contact with Ford as he opened the register.

He probably didn’t want to get yelled at again.

“Before I go, do you carry Pitt Cola?”

“Uh… we have Coke? Or Pepsi?” the boy answered, clearly confused, as he held out Ford’s money.

“Never mind,” Ford sighed, took his change, and quickly walked out.

As he sped out the door, he briefly glimpsed a newspaper with an impossible date of January 23, 2016.

It must have been one of those novelty newspapers you would buy someone for a gag gift. 

Right?

Ford slammed his car door and pealed out of the gas station back onto the freeway.

His mind went over everything that had happened since the radio stations went out- the moon, the horse, the gas station… weird, but perfectly explainable. This was the opposite of how he usually felt. He was always looking for the strange and unusual… but this… there was something fundamentally _wrong_ about this…

His mind raced as he tried to calm himself down, and a few moments later he noticed the moon must have set again, for it was once again pitch black except for his headlights. He decided to try the radio one more time, and was relieved when a mostly clear rendition of one of his favorite songs came on.

“Disco is dead?” Ford repeated what the teenager had said in the gas station, and snorted. “Never.”

The music cheered his spirits, the creepy feeling was finally gone, and before dawn Ford reached his destination, driving past a sign that said “Welcome to Gravity Falls! Nothing to see here, folks!”

As he climbed in his motel bed, Ford decided the whole weird experience was just a result of excitement, lack of sleep, and Fiddleford’s paranoia being contagious.

“Nothing to see here, folks,’” he chuckled at the memory of the town’s welcome sign as he finally drifted off to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Handheld games weren’t really commercialized until around 1978, but maybe Ford saw some prototypes at Backupsmore. Or maybe the Gravity Falls Universe was ahead of its time when it came to video games.
> 
> The Gravity Falls ad for the finale can be found here: https://youtu.be/LbQxZMDfW_g?t=34 (The timestamp is 0:34 if the link doesn’t work properly)
> 
> The random horse galloping along with a car on an empty highway really happened to me. Unfortunately, I did not encounter Ford Pines shortly thereafter.


End file.
